


flowerheads

by Catsired, Donrex



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Flower Shop, Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff, M/M, Pastel Dan Howell, Pastel Dan and Punk Phil, Punk Phil Lester, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-19
Packaged: 2018-10-25 07:44:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10759830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Catsired/pseuds/Catsired, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Donrex/pseuds/Donrex
Summary: You see, Dan wasn’t the most popular kid. He liked soft things and flower crowns and makeup and honestly couldn’t care less about gender rules, so it really wasn’t a surprise that dumb high schoolers were picking on him. Phil wasn’t popular either, but from much different reasons. He was quiet and intimidating and charming in a dark way, (you haven’t heard that from Dan) full of black ink and metal piercings.and the rumors about Dan being "a queer" look insignificant next to rumors about Phil being "a violent-bailed-out-of-prison-drug-user queer" (yes its dumb of him to believe rumors when there were rumors about him too, but Dan was, in fact, 'a queer', so he would rather not test any other rumors to be true or false)





	1. of flower crowns and flower shops

Dan Howell had a very strange relationship with Phil Lester.

They sat next to each other by accident at the beginning of the year, (Phil coming in late and diving into the only open spot) and it was… not half as bad as Dan thought it would be.

Now, you may say, "That does not sound like much of a strange relationship" and well, yes, because the absurd part was, Dan and Phil never actually... _interacted_   before. (Dan isn’t sure he even knows how Phil Lester sounds like, honestly.) They never addressed each other vocally, nor by notes. Actually, Phil was not even there 30% of the time, and needless to say, Dan was very content with this arrangement. He could sit silently and actually listen to the teacher, and nobody dared to look his way while he was sitting next to Phil, scared to start a fight; and even with all that, Dan has no interest whatsoever in ever saying "Thank you," or "Can you give me a pen?" or even "Hi, my name is Dan," to Phil Lester.

You see, Dan wasn’t the most popular kid. He liked soft things, and flower crowns, and makeup, and honestly couldn’t care less about gender rules, so it really wasn’t a surprise that dumb high schoolers were picking on him.

Phil wasn’t exactly popular either, but for much different reasons. He was quiet, and intimidating, and charming in a dark way, (you didn't hear that from Dan) full of black ink and metal piercings. The rumors about Dan being "a queer" look insignificant next to the rumors about Phil being "a violent-bailed-out-of-prison-drug-user queer" (yes its dumb of him to believe rumors when there were rumors about him too, but Dan was, in fact, 'a queer', so he would rather not test any other rumors to be true or false).

Dan was  _NOT_ that desperate for friends.

So Dan and Phil sat next to each other, which was really not half as bad as Dan thought it would be, but sadly, there was a downside:

Whenever Phil was absent (which was, as mentioned, quite a lot), Dan was the one to do the damage control.

"Could you give it to Philip?", "Do you mind going to Philip's house after school and handing him over some papers?", etc.

He always had an excuse as to why he couldn't.

But today… let's just say he had a shortage of excuses at the moment.

So when Phil didn’t show up due to "sickness", and the teacher called out for Dan, and said "Be a sweetheart and lend a hand?"

And he already used his parent's anniversary (which is actually on summer),

and his (non-existed) sister's birthday,

and his (very alive) grandma's funeral,

and his (7 year-old) cousin's wedding; he was officially out of excuses. Dan sighed in defeat and grabbed the paper for himself, then one more for Phil.

And so at the end of his last period, he took a right turn instead of a left and started walking towards the address that was supposedly Phil's.

It wasn’t a long walk, (we're talking about a 5 minutes' walk) and Dan didn’t know what to think of that, because if Phil wasn’t absent, he was just late, then how lazy do you have to be to not walk a 5 minute walk? He stopped at the front door of the building, and suddenly he started to have second thoughts.

 _'Me? In Phil Lester's house? It probably looks like a murder scene from a bad cops show in there. Why did I even come here?'_ He thought.

He was already here, though, and Dan just wanted to hand him his homework and move on with his life, so he took the lift to the right floor and knocked on the door.

The seconds stretched as he stared at the closed door, not sure what he would see behind it. He was about to turn around and run away when a voice from the inside rang out, "Coming!" (In a tone which was way too cheery) and he knew there was no way out of this now.

He had assumed the voice was Phil's, since, well, it's  _his_ flat, and he never heard him talk before, so he had nothing to compare to. (no kidding. He was never called on to answer a question and always showed up after the name calling) However, the guy who opened the door was definitely not Phil.

His hair was brown and fluffy (even more than bad-hair-days-Dan), his eyes greenish-blue, and he had like, 0 peircings.

 _'Am I at the wrong place?'_ Dan stared for a second, and the guy stared back.

"Sooo… you wanted something?" Not-Phil asked eventually. Dan huffed to cover his embarrassment and then coughed one time for good measure.

"Does… does Phil live here?" he asked eventually. Not-Phil's face changed immediately from curiosity to surprise.

"Yes," He answered, but before Dan could say anything, he added, "he isn't here at the moment, though."

Dan tried not to look exhausted as he fixed his flower crown and stared behind the guy into the apartment, like he was trying to find Phil in there. He was surprised when the wall that stared back at him was bright blue with an old movie poster on it. _'_ _Not what I expected.'_

"Well… where is he then? Isn’t he sick?" Dan asked eventually.

"Sick? … No. He's working. Just don’t tell your teachers; Phil said you aren’t allowed to work." Not-Phil looked kind of concerned at the end of the sentence, like he said too much.

"I won't," Dan promised, because it really wasn’t his business, and then added, "Well, it's not important enough to bother him while working. I'm just here for-" he opened his bag and started searching for Phil's assignment sheet. "-this," he said when he finally found it. "Can you give it to him?" he asked hopefully, and smiled when Not-Phil reached out for the paper in Dan's hand. "Okay then… I'll be going…" Dan turned around and headed for the lift.

"I like your style," said Not-Phil when Dan pushed the button, startling him.

He did not expect this would include so much... social interaction.

"Is that so?" Dan asked awkwardly as a smile formed on his lips, no matter how hard he tried to fight it down.

"Yeah. Very 'fuck the system', but in nice colors."

The lift's doors were opening, but then Not-Phil kept talking, quietly, like he's not sure if he wants Dan to hear it.

"This is the first time anyone ever came to give Phil the work he missed. He keeps getting scolded for not catching up, and he keeps going to detention, but it's really not his fault," Then Dan was in the lift, and the doors were closing, and Dan never felt guiltier.

It wasn’t a surprise nobody else from school wanted anywhere near Phil. It wasn't news to Dan that whenever he said he couldn’t, some other student took his place. It also wasn't hard to guess that those students only said they would do it, then never really did. Honestly, that was what Dan should’ve done. Say he'd do it and… not. but he isn’t that kind of a guy. Yes, he bends the truth a little... but he would never break his word.

And Phil was getting scolded for that, apparently. According to this guy. Getting scolded and keeping quiet; because of Dan. _What the fuck._

That sounds so out of character Dan finds himself wanting to ask Phil. Yes, you heard right, Dan Howell's mind has come up with almost the worst idea ever. It doesn’t matter that its Dan's fault, in a bypassing way, that Phil is failing school. Phil is a big boy, (There are rumors about him repeating a year a few times so he probably really is a big boy) and Phil can solve his own problems.

So Dan returned home, thinking about Phil Lester... he did his homework, and got a bit mad about Phil Lester... and then fell asleep, trying to forget about any of the new pieces he got that could help him solve the puzzle that was Phil Lester.

~~~

Dan was slightly mad, because of the amount of space Phil took up in his brain the previous day, as he woke up in the morning.

He wore his favorite sweater, and his favorite flower crown, and prayed Phil would take another "sick" day so that Dan's brain wouldn't come up with any more great ideas like talking to Phil Lester and getting Dan into a lot of trouble.

And Phil really didn’t show up; but then he did.

Dan was sitting at his desk, alone, thanking god, when the teacher called Phil's name and nobody answered.

Then the lesson started, and Dan relaxed, (and definitely let his guard down) as he thought to himself that, yeah, maybe a day without Phil means more staring and whispering behind him, but at least he didn’t have to deal with the intimidating, guilt tripping… asshole! Phil Lester.

This was the exact moment the devil himself walked into class.

Dan almost fell off his chair (don’t sway on your chair kids), as Phil gave a nod to the teacher, and started walking right towards his seat.

To Dan's surprise, though, when Phil pulled the chair out next to him and sat down, he wasn't even sure what he was mad about before.

He studied Phil for a little while, for the first time not looking away and denying Phil's existence next to him, and was quite shocked when Phil pulled a notebook out of his bag and opened it, flipping to a new page (the notebook was almost full! Dan wasn’t sure he himself took this many notes), and started writing whatever the teacher was saying.

 _Or maybe_ , Dan thought as Phil pulled out the paper Dan himself gave Not-Phil from Phil's apartment, only now it was full with handwritten answers, _maybe I was judging him wrongly all this time._

Phil caught Dan gazing at the paper in his hand, and a small smile crossed his face. It was small, not scary, and so honest, Dan was afraid he was imagining it.

That was the day Dan had seen his first ever smile from Phil.

~~~

The next time Phil didn’t show up, Dan didn’t make any excuses. He took two assignments and tried not to look too eager about it.

When he knocked on Phil's door for the second time, he was much less surprised when the same guy opened up.

"He's working again?" Dan asked, already handing the assignment to Not-Phil.

"Yup. I guess that mean you didn’t say anything?" He smiled as he took the papers from Dan's hand.

"It's really none of my business," Dan said as he walked back to where the lift was, trying to make it sound like the conversation was over. (He wanted to feel better with himself after doing that to Phil, and he also wanted to see Phil smile at him again, but small-talks with this stranger were really giving him an awkward time.) It didn’t work, because yet again, Not-Phil kept talking as Dan was waiting for the lift.

"Thank you," he said, and Dan couldn’t do anything but look at the floor.

"Sure…" he said awkwardly, then pressed the button again.

"I mean it. I bet Phil didn’t tell you that, but he is too. I keep telling him, 'You make it sound like Dan doesn't want to talk to you, but if you never say a word yourself, he won't know you want to either,' y'know?"

Dan nods politely as the lifts door's open, and then he's all but running into the lift. _'_ _Nothing is more embarrassing than strangers pouring their heart out to you,'_ he thinks as he waits inside the lift.

 _'I don’t even know this guy's damn name, yet there he is, giving me relationship advice?'_ He asks himself as he's leaving the building.

 _'How does he even know all this?'_ He thinks as he waits for the light to turn green.

 _'Who the heck is he?'_ The light turns green.

_'How does he know my name?'_

Dan stops in the middle of the road. _'_ _How **DOES** he know my name? What the heck?'_

Phil's life and his own are getting more and more tangled, much more than he wanted. Phil is a mystery Dan is  _not_ eager to solve; a kind of person Dan does  _not_ want to be involved with. Phil is just a guy. A scary, punk, quiet guy he sits next to because it’s a comfortable arrangement. That is all. Even if he misjudged him. Even if the rumors are wrong. Dan just… doesn’t want this kind of drama in his life.

Sadly for Dan, though, that is exactly what he is going to get.

~~~

Dan is just on his way back from school a few days later when it starts raining.

As every rainy day works, it started as a single drop; and then another one, right on Dan's nose.

Dan hadn’t even brought his hand to his face before he felt another one on his cheek, then another, and another, as slowly but surely they made Dan's clothes a shade just a bit darker than before, but also a lot more wet than before.

"Oh, fuck!" Dan exclaimed and started running.

And then the wind started.

It was unfair, really. Dan barely got the chance to register what was happening as a great wind came and snapped his flower crown off his head.

"No!" was all he could say before the crown rolled into the road, only to be ran over by a car.

"My crown!" he said, but the whining wind won that round, since it was too loud for even Dan to hear himself.

Lightning flickered above and Dan had to admit defeat as he sent one last pitiful glance at the wracked flowers before turning around and running towards his house, before anyone could see his hair getting all curly and horrifying.

~~~

Dan needed a new flower crown.

Yes, he had a lot of flower crowns, but they were all different! The soft blue and azure looked nothing alike, and don’t get him started on his pink collection.

Now, he was lacking a purple flower crown.

Not only a flower crown, but a handmade flower crown he bought in a flower shop when his family was abroad.

This is a disaster. He must get another one. Where will he even find a flower shop on such a short notice? There must be something close by… right?

He decided on going and investigating when the rain would officially stop. No more sneak attacks on him or any of his precious flower crowns.

He just hoped it would be soon. Say… tomorrow.

~~~

The rain did not stop tomorrow.

Or the day after. The days were stretching, and Dan hadn’t worn a flower crown in a week now, using scarfs as a replacement accessory, too scared to lose more than the one already gone (rest in peace, you beautiful, gentle thing.)

He also gave up on straightening his hair, since the rain destroyed all his hard work anyway.

There were a few comments ("Hey, Howell, I see you gave up on the straight feign." Which, wow, was honestly such an original burn) but Dan couldn’t do anything about them but scowl and keep walking.

And then there was Phil.

Phil showed up every single day on the stormy week. And it made sense, obviously, since there was no way he could work at… whatever he was working at in this weather, but if Dan was in his place, he would know better than to break his reputation like that. Teachers would suspect.

He would’ve told him... if it was his business.

But it wasn’t.

So he didn’t.

But he started to notice Phil more.

He noticed the way Phil's tongue popped out from his mouth as he took notes, or the way Phil's eyes scanned the cafeteria and stopped when finding Dan and all the open spots next to him, only to end up leaving the cafeteria to eat somewhere else, or how, if Dan's eyes just happened to linger on him, and he just happened to look back at Dan at that same second, Phil would send Dan one of his smiles.

They got bigger each time, but lasted less time, so nobody else would catch them.

It was the only expression Dan saw Phil make in school (or ever, since they never met out of school) which wasn’t a blank face, and Dan was denying, maybe even straight up lying to himself, that those smiles started to become the highlight of his day.

~~~

The rain stopped. Thank fucking god and goddamn Jesus.

One more storm day and Dan would’ve blown his own head off.

It was also Sunday, which was the perfect day for the quest Dan had set for himself. He was going to find a flower shop that makes flower crowns and buy a new one. Nothing could stop him.

It would be nice if he knew where to start, though.

It isn't about London not having flower shops, but about Dan never leaving his house and randomly stumbling upon them before, so he's just going to have to walk around until he finds one.

It's weird not knowing parts of a city you live in.

You can wander around places you’ve been to years before and not recognizing them at all.

You can turn around a corner and get to a place you’ve never been to, or you can get back to where you started at, which in Dan's opinion are both terrifying options.

 _'I should’ve just taken the underground, or the bus…'_ Dan thinks bitterly as he turns around only to find himself directly in front of Phil's apartment.

 _'How did I even get here?'_ He looks around and starts walking down the street in a direction he's pretty sure he had never gone before.

When he got into a small, friendly looking mall, he felt like Moses getting to his promise land.

Thank god.

And after Dan got in and bought himself some fast food; he finally found what he was looking for.

Hallelujah.

He was standing in front of a tiny shop with a sign that said "plants n' smiles", and it looked warm, and green, and Dan found it so nice that even if he wouldn’t find himself a flower crown, the least he could do is buy himself a plant.

But when he stepped in and immediately spotted none other than Phil Lester, wearing the biggest, brightest, and most beautiful smile Dan had ever been so lucky to witness, (Phil's smiles are so weird because he had this lip piercing, and people smiling with lip piercings should look scary and not adorable?!) and talking to some old lady, he stopped dead in his tracks.

The old woman smiled back at Phil, completely oblivious to Dan standing there and staring as she pulled out a wallet and handed Phil money, then took a small pot with some succulent in it and walked out, passing next to Dan without batting an eye.

"Welcome-" Phil face froze as he looked at Dan, but Dan was too busy processing the fact that he had just heard Phil's voice for the first time, and it was fucking _cute._

 _Of course. Of fucking course Phil Lester, Local Punk, Mysterious BoyTM, has the sweetest voice Dan has ever heard_.

Dan stared at Phil with a frown, then at his clothes, as he was only now noticing the name tag and the shop's logo on Phil's dark t-shirt.

"You work _here_?" he says with an emphasis on the here, like the fact that Phil works is not much of a shock to him. (And it isn’t, since Not-Phil already told him, but it apparently was to Phil.)

Phil looked at Dan with the same blank expression he wears every day to school, but Dan found that after all the smiles he had gotten from Phil, it didn’t have quite the same intimidating effect.

Then Phil smiles once more, this time at Dan, and even though it was not as bright as the one before, Dan took that as a sign to go farther into the shop and move next to the counter, where Phil was standing.

"I need to pay rent," Phil answered sheepishly. "I also love it here. What do you need?" his voice was unsure, like he was holding himself from saying more.

Dan wondered what he was supposed to answer. He knew he came here for a reason, but he was a little… distracted. He tried tracing back to before he heard Phil's voice and came back blank. (Oh, come on, brain, seriously?)

Due to the lack of something to say, he stared.

Phil was wearing his usual dark clothes, but, Dan is noticing for the first time, he does not look like he's trying to intimidate anyone.

Heck, with that smile he saw a moment ago? He looked like a sun trying to hide under rain clouds.

Phil got fidgety under his stare. "What? Is something wrong?" Phil asked warily and looked down on himself consciously, trying to find the problem.

"What? No! I just… you never talked to me before?" Great idea, Dan, blame it all on him.

Phil just seemed embarrassed, though, "I… I thought you didn’t want me to. Didn’t want to pressure you or anything."

What the fuck was with this guy? Dan stared some more, looking for something to say. After about 3 times opening and closing his mouth, he finally lets out an "I was… looking for… a…" he looks around at all the flowers, "a flower crown! I wanted a new flower crown,"

Phil brightens up in a second, "A flower crown? I can make you one," he stops then, before saying, "it's gonna take a while to make, though. I need to make sure the flowers would last and be wearable… would you be okay with waiting?"

Dan nods eagerly, and Phil smiles even bigger, any unease he had gone.

"Do you want to go to the back and pick the flowers?" Phil suggests, pointing behind him.

A small part in Dan immediately thinks maybe that’s how he kills his victims, by pretending to be nice and inviting them to back rooms, but that sounds ridiculous the second it crosses his mind, because he is pretty sure he never saw a smile this genuine from anyone before, and so he says, "Sure," and follows Phil.

The back room is full of plants and bouquets in every color, which contrasted with Phil's dark theme, especially because he was looking at all the plants lovingly and not looking at all dark in any way.

"Those, I think," Dan said, tearing his eyes away from Phil and looking instead a purple bouquet.

"Alright," Phil beamed (beamed! Dan didn’t know people their age could do that!) And scribbled something on the plastic wrapper of the bouquet.

He then turned to look at Dan.

"I… it's gonna take a while to make so would you… I mean… if I could have your phone number…" Dan stared dumbly as Phil tried awkwardly to get his point across.

"Or not! I mean… you probably wouldn’t want my phone but… I don’t know if you'd want to talk to me during school-"

"I wouldn’t mind," Dan interrupted, since at some point Phil started to blush, and it already got all the way to his neck, and since he really wouldn’t mind.

If Phil looked like that only for permission to talk to him, it would be even weirder _not_ to agree.

Also, Dan doesn’t think anyone ever tried this hard to be his friend, and clearly he misjudged Phil completely (or at least partly), and… well… their agreement was great all year until now, and if Dan could get an actual friend out of it… even better, right? So he repeated, "I wouldn’t mind if you'd talk to me during school. Why would I?"

Phil looked bashed as he worried his lip piercing with his teeth (dear god) and said, "But I thought people would-"

Only to get interrupted again by Dan, who said, "Do you really think I care what everyone thinks? Look at what I wear. I haven't had a good reputation for years now, and if I want to talk to punks like you, and sit with them at lunch, and give them homework when they're not at school, then I will," he said, and it was a lie because it was exactly why he didn’t want to talk to Phil in the first place, but it felt right saying it, because he really wanted to do those things now. (It also made Phil smile and Dan found that he kinda likes Phil's smiles. A lot)

"Thanks for that, by the way," Phil said as they got out of the back, to find a boy and his mom looking at a flower pot.

"For what?"

"The homework. It's really important to me," Phil smiled at him one more time before stepping to talk with the customers.

At first, the mom pulled her son closer, but after a smile and Phil's calm understanding tone, the little boy got his courage up and told him what he wanted.

Dan leaned on the counter and watched as Phil smiled and pulled a pot from the top shelf without any big gestures, and gave the pot to the boy, telling both him and his mom how to take care of it.

Then he turned to the counter and smiled easily at Dan, like he'd already gotten used to him being around, and stepped behind him to get to the cash register.

"You can give it a name, if you'd like," Phil smiled at the boy as the mom handed him the money.

The boy looked at him like he gave him the secret of the universe.

He stared for a second and then asked, "What's your name?"

"Phil," Phil answered.

"I'm going to call it Phil, then!" the boy beamed as his mom thanked Phil and pulled him out of the shop.

Phil waved until they couldn't see the boy and the mom anymore.

"I get it," Dan said, looking a little dazzled.

Phil looked at him questioningly.

"Never mind. I would like to buy a plant as well, if I'm already here" Dan said, pointing at a cactus with a blooming flower on it. Phil took the small pot and handed it to Dan carefully, and Dan put the money on the counter so he could hold it with both his hands.

"Would you name it?" asked Phil as he opened the cash register and inserted the money.

Dan thought about it for a moment before saying, "Actually, I would like to call it Phil, too, if that’s okay,"

Phil didn’t look up from the cash register, but Dan could see the tips of his ears getting red as he answered, "Of course you can. I don’t own this name," then, quieter, "isn’t the first time someone named a plant after me either," which made Dan laugh.

"Alright, Phil. I guess I'll see you at school?" Phil nodded as Dan stepped out of the small flower shop, protecting his new cactus between his hands.


	2. of sappy notes, tattoos and friendship

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i made the mistake of not planing my next chapters, which is why updates are slow. im so so sorry. let me make it up to you with a nice chapter full of foreshadowing and dan being internally gay

All…right then? Dan had a new friend… probably?

It was embarrassing for him to admit, but he was pretty excited to go to school the next day. Who gets excited about going to school? Especially in high school. That’s so dumb.  
But as he put on some nice baby blue jeans and a white sweater with blue dots at the bottom and on the sleeves, he could feel himself literally buzzing.

 _'Calm down, will you?'_ He told himself harshly as he caught himself skipping his way to school. He slowed to a walk and looked around to make sure no one was there.

He knew it was stupid (so very incredibly stupid), to be happy about making a friend (because they weren’t quite friends yet and because that friend was literally Phil Lester), but he couldn’t help himself; not even batting an eye as a soccer player crushed him into his locker and made his stuff fly all over, or when a girl behind him laughed as he smiled and picked up the books and walked away, telling her best friend he's probably in a good mood because he got laid.

 _'High schoolers are such idiots'_ , he thought as he sat down at his desk, watching the class getting more full and loud around him.

Phil didn’t show up, but then again, he was always late.

So then, when the teacher got into class and turned around to close the door, a hand stopped it, and into the class stepped Phil Lester, panting an apology to the teacher and walking towards their desk.

Everyone around whispered and murmured as Phil sank into his chair. It was the first time Phil was not late(ish) for class.  
He was clearly running, as well, to make it.

Dan stared as Phil took off his black leather jacket, which left him with a black tank top, putting his very tattooed arms on display.

"Philip, you know what the school's rules about short sleeves and sleeveless shirts are. Especially with those things on your body," The teacher scolded.

The murmuring increased as Phil stared her down without making any move to put his jacket back on.

"I will give you a few seconds to cool down," said the teacher after losing their stare down, "but you will be given a detention if you will walk around school like that when class is over." Then, after he nodded, she proceeded to calm everyone into silence and started the class.

Dan stared at Phil some more as he was writing notes, the ink on his arms moving with the muscles below them. The contrast between the ink and Phil's white skin was beautiful. Flowers and words and- is that a dragon? All on Phil's skin, displayed for anyone to see.

Dan knew he was not the only one in the class staring.

Phil looked at him out of the corner of his eyes before flashing Dan one of his smiles. Dan's heart was throbbing in his throat as he smiled back. He ripped the corner of the notebook in front of him and wrote with his scribbly hand writing _'_ everyone is staring at you.' Before sliding it to Phil's side of the desk.

Phil didn’t notice it at first, too busy with his notes, but after Dan nudged it into Phil's notebook, Phil froze.

He looked at the note, then at Dan, then at the note again, and then finally moved to open it. Dan stared at his arm as he did it.

Phil read it, then scribbled on the note himself and passed it back.

'Are we notes passing buddies now?' It read in a nice, spaced handwriting. Dan was impressed.

'Buddies?' Dan wrote back with a smirk on his lips. This time it was much easier getting Phil's attention.

Phil pouted a little as he read it (May Jesus spare his soul) and wrote back 'well you're staring as well.'

Dan could feel the tips of his ears reddening as he wrote back.

'Yeah, well, why did you run all the way to school?' And passed it to Phil again.

He didn’t look at Phil as he read it, but when the reply failed to come, he turned his head to find Phil holding his pen just above the paper, lips pursed, his cheeks tinted with a light pink. Dan smiled and turned his attention back to the teacher.

~~~

When Dan got to his locker he was surprised by the silence that surrounded it.

The mystery was solved soon enough as he looked around and found out two things:

1: Everyone in the hall were keeping a distance from him, and

2: Phil was leaning on the lockers behind him.

Dan closed his locker and turned around. He could see people holding their breath.

They probably think Phil is going to kill me right where I stands and wants to be witnesses. Dan thought, and he found it very funny.

Phil was staring at Dan with a blank expression, aware of everyone around them.

"You coming to lunch, punk?" Dan asked casually with a smile.

He could hear someone next to them taking a sharp breath. Phil pushed himself off the wall and Dan started marching to the cafeteria, feeling everyone's eyes on him and on Phil, walking behind him like a shadow.

He grabbed two trays and set down at his usual spot, Phil sitting down right next to him.

"Well that was hilarious," said Dan as he ripped open the plastic bag with a fork in it.

Phil looked around them expressionless before saying, "I think they really thought I was gonna knock you down." He looked worried, but a small smile appeared on his face as Dan snorted.

"Oh my god, I have no idea how you kept this bad guy image for so long" Phil's smile widened before disappearing as he started digging into his food.

Dan wanted to ask how did he get a bad boy image in first place and, well, why, because Phil was clearly not about to knock anyone out anytime soon, but kept to himself, because he wanted to believe he would find a better time for these questions then in a high school cafeteria when the whole school pretends he isn’t watching you.  
As the day ended, Dan found himself thinking that befriending Phil might have been his best idea yet.

~~~

A few days into the friendship, and Dan forgot what his life looked like without Phil. They walked from class to class together, ate together. Phil showed him places in school he never thought to explore alone. No one dared saying anything about their friendship (not in front of them, anyway) and Phil… well he was just… so fun to have around. Dan found himself thinking that a lot. He was a good listener, has the weirdest stories, and generally a very aesthetically pleasing guy to be around, if you… know what Dan means… (the guy is hot.)

Phil in front of other people and Phil alone were practically two different people, and once you’ve seen the later, the more you wanted of it.

His smile was addictive. His expressions are priceless. Dan could stare at Phil's eyes as he was talking and forget what he was about to say because they were so so alive. In front of other people Phil was cool and mysterious, but Dan liked the Phil that was more than that.

He did, however, notice Phil's discomfort when it came to public places. He didn’t say a thing when Dan led him to the cafeteria or to the grounds outside, but Dan felt the way Phil shut himself from being... well, himself? when other people were around. His smiles were always short and he barely talked, but Dan didn’t know any place around for him and Phil to be alone at.

And so, when one day Phil grabbed Dan's hand and pulled him with their trays from the cafeteria, Dan hoped… well, he kind of hoped Phil was going to give him a new puzzle piece for him to put together.

They ended up in front of a locked room. Or, Dan thought it was locked, but Phil simply kicked the bottom of the door and pushed the handle before the door gave in.

"I did it," Phil admitted sheepishly as they stepped into a room that probably used to be a music room. "The door. They think it's broken so they moved the class somewhere else."

"It looked pretty broken to me." Said Dan as he sat down on a piano chair.

Phil closed the door and pointed to the lock hole, then to the bottom of the door, "It's not really broken… I just… messed it up a little."

Looking closely, Dan realized now that there were tiny scratch and kick marks all over it.

Phil took of his jacket. He had a long sleeved black shirt below it, and Dan was doing his best not to look disappointed. (Why would he be? It's not like Phil looked really good in short sleeves or that Dan had a slight obsession with Phil's tattoos or something.)

And that became their quiet place.

Dan loved how much being alone opened Phil up. He tried picturing Phil being here alone every lunch break, but while looking at him animatedly telling a story about a squirrel, he couldn’t imagine what Phil could be doing while he doesn’t talk or smile or pretend to be an Edgy Bad Boy. (Or maybe he doesn’t pretend. Dan doesn’t think he knows Phil well enough to fully understand this Hanna Montana situation)

And when Phil asked, "would you like to come to my work today?" Dan needed a second to snap out and process.

When Dan didn’t answer right away, Phil started blabbering. "I mean, I would offer to go to my place but I have to work and you could do your homework there and I might finish your crown so you can pick it up-" he sucked in a breath.

Dan snorted fondly. "Yeah of course" he said.

~~~

That flower shop was really a magical place. Dan could understand why Phil liked it so much. There was a strong sent of freshness and wet leaves, and the walls were decorated with fairy lights and terrarium-full shelves. There were bouquets at the front of the store, and succulents hanging from the ceiling...The flower shop was cozy and Phil made everywhere a brighter place, which gave the shop a special place in Dan's heart.

The weirdest thing was how well Phil fitted into it. Dan knew he was staring (he is doing that way too much) but he just couldn’t help but notice that Phil, (the piercings, the tattoos and everything) looked like he fitted right in with all the potted nature around him. He clearly belonged there.

"Hey, Dan?" Phil called.

Dan was sitting next to the counter and "doing his homework". Phil made Dan's flower crown between costumers, chatting with Dan happily about the new plants he took to his apartment.

"Yeah?" Dan answered, looking up from his notebook, where instead of working he doodled a bunch of plants and Phil's name in a fancy cursive handwriting.  
"I need to measure your head." Phil said, raising his flower full hand.

As it turned out, to make flower crowns you needed more than flowers. You needed a base and a lot of tape (special tape. Please don’t abuse flowers at home) but you also needed skill and experience, something Phil clearly had.

Dan closed the notebook and dropped it on the counter. Phil was holding a flower coated metal rod. He laid it down and took off Dan's current flower crown, ("plastic," he murmured) before taking a string and wrapping it around Dan's head, measuring it.

"Yeah, I think I'm done." He said, comparing the string and the flowered rod. Then, giving a soft smile to Dan, he bended and closed the newly created crown with a purple string.  
"There you go," he said, lifting the crown up as if he is going to put it on Dan's head. He stops, then, and with an awkward apology hands it to Dan instead. Dan tried not to look disappointed.

"Thanks," he says, and puts it on. He can't see it, but it feels good and Dan already knows he looks great in flower crowns, so he isn’t worried about that. "How much is that?" he asks, already looking through his pockets. He stops when Phil doesn’t answer.

"You… you don’t need to…?" Phil said, looking surprised. It seems as if the thought of having Dan pay for what he made for him didn’t even cross his mind.

"Of course I do, Phil, don’t be ridiculous. This is your job." He pulled out a couple of wrinkled bills and laid them on the counter. Then, before Phil could resist, he packed his things and left, waving goodbye through the window to a frowning Phil.

~~~

"Hey, Dan! D'you want tea or something before you leave?" asked Pj.

Pj was, as it turned out, Phil's roommate, (Formerly known as Not-Phil) and from what Phil told him, Pj was a bit crazy.

"Good crazy. I would even argue that he has just the right amount of crazy anyone should have if they want to really have a good time," was what Phil said when Dan finally got around to asking who the fuck is that guy that keeps answering the door.

Other things about Pj were mostly from subtexts Dan gathered; He and Phil were friends for a long time. They were the same age, and the most most important piece of information he figured out, (not thanks to Phil) was that Pj was in college.

It seemed that Phil tells Pj about everything, and so the first time Dan came to deliver paperwork for Phil after they became friends, Pj already treated him as if they know each other as well.

it was weird at first, since they are not friends but, in fact, friends of a mutual friend, who was not around to bridge between them, but Dan found out pretty quickly that Pj was a great guy… when you synchronize your sense of humor with his.

"Yeah, I guess. When does Phil get back?" Dan replied, walking into the apartment and closing the door after him.

"Soon enough. If he's lucky, the tea might still be hot." Called Pj, already in the kitchen.

Phil and Pj's house was overwhelmingly tiny for someone like Dan, who has been living in a big house with his parents and having vacations on his grandparents enormous house abroad all his life. It was barely three rooms, two of which were used for kitchen and bathroom. There was a living room, which was the room Dan was in currently, and a bedroom as well (although Dan has never been there yet).

He couldn’t see how can both Pj and Phil exist in such a tiny space, but somehow… they made it work.

The whole place was radiating warmness. The walls were covered with film and bands posters. There were house plants all over the place. There were books and board games scattered all around, along with socks and cards and music instruments. The couch and table looked too big for the tiny place, yet somehow Dan loved how awkward the place looked.

It was so different yet so alike the flower shop. They were both such warm and light places, and Phil fitted right into them. There was no question whether or not he belonged there.

Dan wanted to fit in there as well.

Pj walked out of the kitchen with two cups, and offered Dan the sugar after he set everything down.

Usually, Dan would let the quiet role it moments like this, but Pj, apparently, didn’t appreciate silence as much as Dan did.

"… and of course, I'm the DM, because my brain itself has its own reality. So I make this cool world with cool robots and a goblin redemption arc, but you know how it is… one chaotic natural bard and everything goes to shit…" Pj keeps on rambling, and Dan tries to nod politely to the story, but he's pretty sure he is staring at Pj like he grew a second head. Luckily, he is saved by the knock on the door, followed by a ramble of keys, and then the door opens and Phil's there.

Dan's brain needs a moment to rewire itself back from Pj's fantasy world, but he is pretty sure he is sending a smile toward the door. Phil used his hand to quickly clean the red liquid running down from his nose and wipes it off on his black pants. He is bleeding.

"Dan," he says, surprised. He looks urgently at Pj, who has apparently already caught on to what was happening. "I didn’t know you're here." he adds, not upset, but distressed.

"I think I actually bored him to death. Didn’t I, Dan?" Pj asks, drawing Dan's attention from Phil's bloody nose.

dan wanted to calmly think his way out of this, but he couldnt. something is happening. phil doesnt want me here.

"Uhhh… is this something I'm not supposed to see?" Dan asks, clearly referring to the bloody nose. Phil fidgets in his place, but doesn’t answer, which tells Dan all he needs to know. He looks down his tea cup, slurps it all in one go, (it wasn’t getting any warmer anyway) and stands up. "Well, that was a… day. Uhh… thanks for the tea, Pj." He walks to the door, where Phil is still standing. He gives him a warm smile. "It's alright, Phil. I'm not here to solve you. Clean yourself up." and then he's out of the door.

He can feel his heart rushing. His brain was not keeping up.

Is Phil a bad guy? Is he a good guy? Is thinking in black and white can really cover a person as complicated as Phil?

There are so many things about Phil he wished he knew, but Phil was obviously more than he looked. Or maybe the opposite. Who knows?

 

"I don’t deserve him, Peej." Dan could hear faintly through the door. Pj said something out of Dan's range. Then, Phil again: "no. I don’t." a sigh. "I'm gonna end up scaring him off."

Peeping is wrong. Get out of here.

But he couldn’t stop overthinking about everything all the way home.

If he was being sincere, there might or might not be something about Phil's mystery that drew Dan in the first place. (Stupid human nature) but thinking about Phil as simply a challenge? It just wasn’t the way to go. Dan isn’t making a puzzle. Dan is making a friend. Phil would tell him everything when he'd feel like it. That’s it. Final call.

Dan is going to just be the best friend he could be for Phil.

(A tiny voice inside him was wondering if he would run away if he knew everything about Phil. He avoided that thought by thinking about the sky, which were still the same color as Phil eyes.)

Dan is just going to be the best friend he could be… the moment he'll get the stupid thoughts about how pretty Phil is out of his head.

Yup. That’s what he's going to do.

Great plan, Dan.


	3. Announcement(?)

Hello!!  
No, not an update (TT^TT im so sorryyy) but a bit of an Audience Participation ^_^  
Im working on the next two chapters, and it would be lovely of yall to put names of bands/albums who u think match phils (&/ pj's!!!) Aesthetic in this fic in the comments!!  
(+bonus points if theres a spesific song u think matches dan and phil's relationship in this fic!)  
Again, im so so sorry that im so damn slow!! Ive got my excuses, but who cares, really.

Soo!! As i said!!! Write stuff so i could listen!! Itll be cool i promise


	4. of bruises and records

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> important information??? on Phil's background?? its more likely then you think.  
> anyway Dan is gay and also a teenage boy there you go

Dan was ashamed to admit he was just as keen as everyone else to catch a piece of Phil's figure when he walked into class the next day. He forced his eyes away, though, knowing Phil doesn’t like being stared at.

'U ok?' he wrote on the edge of his notebook and slid it towards Phil as soon as he sat down. 

Phil stared for a second before writing directly under that, 

'Sorry I practically kicked you out yesterday' and moved on to taking out his own notebook. He was wearing fingerless gloves, Dan noticed, which was very hot- uhh- Suspicious. It was very suspicious. Not hot.

'No biggie. Pj was about to kick me out anyway. I have no idea what he was talking about' Dan wrote before thrusting the notebook back to Phil. 

Phil read it and Dan saw he was holding out a laugh. His lips curled up and Dan could detect a light bruise on the side of his mouth. Phil picked up his pen again, and wrote something before handing it back.

‘Come over today. Ill make it up to u.’ It said. 

Dan tried to stop the fantasy his brain jumped to almost immediately. Instead, he give Phil a small nod, and after a second of thoughts, writes: 

'U look awful, btw’ before handing it back. This time Phil looks a little sheepish, but he doesn’t write anything back. 

They both focus on the teacher. 

"Okay Lester, come here," commended Dan as soon as the break started. 

Phil looked surprised, probably since he never heard Dan use his last name before. Dan started marching to the old music room, and, noticing Phil isn’t following, turned back around. He arched one eyebrow, staring as Phil walked the distance to catch up.

"What?" Phil asked, but Dan did not answer until they were in their room, completely alone. 

“Stay here.” He commanded. Phil nodded awkwardly.

Now, call it whatever you’d like; an intuition, a lucky guess, a complete lack of trust in two semi-adults to take care of a bloody nose- dan knew Phil would not be taken care of after he left. He just knew it. So he headed straight to the informary. 

When he walked back in, Phil was laying on the floor, staring at the florescent lights, a sandwich in his hand.

“Hows the floor?” asked dan sarcastically.

“cold,” replied Phil.

Dan sat beside him and scanned him up and down. “You do not look patched up." He declared. Phil looked at him in confusion. 

"Uhh…" he managed, setting his sandwich aside.

"I left expecting Pj to take care of you. You have not been taken care of,” He adds on. "Let me look at it,” he commended. 

"Dan, it's okay, really-" said Phil, sitting up and rubbing his hands in a pained kind of a way.

"Nope. Shut up." says Dan harshly, before adding in a much softer voice, "I'm not asking any questions. Just let me see you're alright." This seemed to do the job, since Phil gave out a defeated sound and let Dan get closer to him.

Dan hesitated for a moment, before scooting closer and grabbing Phil's chin gently. 

Oh no, hummed his heart as he looked closely at Phil's lips, which were definitely bruised. As was his high beautiful cheekbone, Dan noticed, even though It was a bit difficult to spot, since Phil was very pink at that moment. 

"Gloves, too." Dan said as he let go of Phil's face. 

Phil looked agonised as he tried looking away from Dan and down to his hands. He took them off slowly to reveal bruised knuckles. They'd probably look better if Phil actually took the time to patch himself up yesterday. 

"Phil!" said Dan is surprise. Phil flinched. "You write with that hand! Doesn’t that hurt?" he asked in worry. Phil tried pulling off a casual shrug, but Dan wasn’t buying it. "Why didn’t you put any bandages on that?" He asked. Phil shrugged again. “For fuck’s sake.”

Dan pulled out bandages and iodine from his bag. “Where did you-“ started Phil, but dan shushed him and gently grabbed his hand. 

“I don't know much about nursing, but its not like you're dying,” said dan, smearing the iodine on Phil’s open knuckles. He hissed. “sorry!” Exclaimed dan, not letting go of Phil’s hand. 

“It’s fine! Don't worry,” encouraged Phil, putting on a brave face. Dan gave him a sympathetic smile as he moved on to his other hand. 

It was quiet for a moment, before Phil opened his mouth.

“Your’e wearing the crown I made you,” he pointed out. Dan instinctively tried looking up, even though he couldn't see it. 

“Oh!” He said, remembering. “I guess I am.” he continued to rub in the iodine.

“Did I ever tell you how I learned to make these?” He asked. Dan shook his head no. “theres this woman that owns the flower shop,” he said. It seemed to be easier for him to ignore the sting by distracting both of them. “Her name is poppy,” 

“Poppy?” Asked dan, going along.

“I'm pretty sure isn't her real name, because its too ironic,” he smiled to himself. Dan nodded for him to keep going.

“Well, she's old. Like, ancient. I met her in-” he stopped, as if catching himself last second before saying “well, she saw I was not a bad dude, and she thought I had a green thumb?”

“You do, though.” Said dan. And It was true. Dan had seen Phil taking care of plants- both in the store and in his house- and it was very clear to see how green he was. The plants seemed to flourish simply from Phil being around them. It was like- well, dan wasn't one for cheesy metaphors, but it was like they lived off his light. Like he was the sun and the plants were growing around it, soaking all his brightness. 

Phil looked a bit sheepish. “thanks. She just- I don't know how she figured it out at the time, though.” He said. Dan smiled at him. 

“Anyway, we were talking about my future one time, and she said that- because my flat is so close to her shop- I could come and learn how to take care of flowers, so i- dan are you done?” He asked suddenly, looking down at his hands, whom were still held in dan’s, even though he was not using them.

“Oh! Sorry! I am done, yes.” Said dan pulling his hands away. Well, he wasn't quite done yet, he still had…

“So I-“

“Sorry, Phil, uh- is it okay if I…?” Dan raised his hand to phil’s face, but didn't touch it. 

Phil took a moment to digest the question, before his ears and cheeks got pink. “Yes! I mean- okay. Yes,” he said, staying incredibly still as dan laid carful fingers on his cheek, rubbing the ointment as cautiously as he could. It was hot. Phil had closed his eyes and looked very focused. 

“Okay, now just-“ dan lifted his fingers for a second, before bringing his finger to the side of Phil’s mouth. “Sorry,” he said quietly. Phil tried nodding, but dan stopped him. 

His heart was beating fast from the intimacy of it all, and yet he chose to pin these thoughts for later- say… his bad time; since it is better to think about kissing boys then about dying.

“Is it alright?” He asked as soon as he was done. 

“Ive been though worse.” Said Phil. Dan wiped his hands and then grabbed the bandages from the floor next to him.

“Do you want to do this?” Asked dan. Phil shook his head. “So what were you saying about this women?” Dan asked, attaching the plasters carefully to the parts he had cleaned, one by one.

“Yes! So- she invited me so she could teach me all that stuff, and after- a month? She goes ‘Philip, I’m old and you're young and powerful, and I need someone to reach high shelves, would you work here?’” He was making his voice high and shaky to mimic her. Dan laughed. “So I told her I could do it for free, because it sounds ridiculous for her to pay me, and she reminded me that I live alone now, so I have to pay bills… and here I am now.” He concluded. 

Dan was holding the last two bandages in his hand but didn't move. “I never saw her around when I came.” He wondered aloud.

“Well, you come on my shift. She takes care of things when I'm at school and stuff like that,” Phil shrugs. “Are you finished?”

“almost.” Said dan, looking at the bandage in his hand, and slowly raising it to Phil’s face. 

“uh-“ called Phil as dan was about to put on at the end of his mouth- “I don’t- umm-“ he leaned away from dan.

“Come on Phil, its not gonna hurt.” Said Dan, but he didn’t push it. Phil considered for a moment before leaning back in. 

Dan smoothed the bandage for a second, before leaning back and judging his work. Once again, he couldn't help but be reminded that Phil… wasn’t… not attractive? (fuck.) The sight on him with bandages, that added on to the black fashion and the piercings was- it was something alright. (F u c k!) Dan’s train of thoughts was going off the trail, and he could feel himself heating up all the way from his ears to his neck. Fucking teenage hormones.

“Feels weird,” said Phil, touching the bandage near his mouth carefully. Dan got up from the floor and sat on a chair at the corner of the class. “You okay?” Asked Phil, following him. 

“Its just- nothing,” He got up and opened the window. “So- uh… am I coming over today?” He distracted awkwardly, leaning against the wall and watching Phil pick up his lunch again and sit on one of the tables.

“Yeah, PJ is going to study all day, so he’s not home. We could… hang out?” The last words were said in a bit of a confused tone, as if Phil himself didn't know what he was talking about.   
Dan snorted. “Alright,” he said, before pushing off the wall and joining Phil on the table. 

~~~

“Who is this, then?” Dan asked the ceiling. He was laying on Phil’s bed, staring up.

“Oh please, dan, even if our music taste isn't the same, there’s a line,” Answered, not the celling, but Phil, whom was next to the record player at the corner of the room, putting on a new album. There was a static noise for a few seconds, before soft music started filling the room. 

Phil returned to the bed and laid down opposite to Dan. Head next to toes. 

“…The Beatles?” Asked dan, now recognising the start of ‘here comes the sun’ 

“Of course. I’d be very worried if you hadn't known.” Said Phil teasingly. 

“neither of you look like you love The Beatles enough to buy their album. Even if its a classic.” Pointed out dan, moving his foot to the light beat. 

The song changed. It was now slower and very sad. 

“PJ got it from his dad,” supplied Phil, and dan could here the smile in his voice. 

They stayed silent for the rest of the song. It wasn't a bad silent, or an awkward one. It was full of thoughts, though.

The next one started playing, but only after the beat started to pick up (as much as Beatles’ songs do, anyway) did any of them speak again. 

“Hi, Phil?” Asked dan cautiously.

“Yeah?” Answered Phil in a low voice, only so louder then the music. 

“does… do… is it…” he went quiet again. He wanted to know stuff. Know more. More then he could figure out himself, and more importantly, he wished the stuff he knew were given by will. “Whats your favourite colour?” He asked eventually, even though he regretted it the moment it left his mouth. That was stupid. 

“… why are you asking?” Asked Phil. And frankly? Dan wasn't sure. 

“I was just thinking- well, you know- we never actually asked any important questions,” answered dan, wishing he could take the whole conversation back.

“Important stuff… like my favourite colour?” Inquired Phil. 

“the most Important,” deadpanned dan. Phil laughed. 

“Lets make a deal, then. Every question must be mutual,” suggested Phil. 

“Mutual?” Asked dan. 

“My favourite colour is blue. At least, the simple answer is blue. What is your favourite colour, dan?” 

The song changed in the background. It seemed as though the songs were getting more lively as the album progressed. 

Mutual. “Gold. Simple answer.” Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea after all. “favourite part of the day?” Asked dan, before adding, “skywise.” 

Phil stayed quiet for a ,moment. “Yours?” He asked eventually. 

“dawn, I think.” Answered dan honestly. 

“I think mine is dusk,” answered Phil after more thinking. There was a bit of quiet. “Whats the difference between dawn and dusk?” Wondered Phil aloud. 

“I think dawn is softer, somehow?” Replied dan. 

The song was becoming obnoxiously loud and full of statics, and Phil got up to lower the volume. 

“Do you want a different album?” Asked Phil. 

Dan propped himself on his elbows to look at Phil. He was wearing a black t-shirt and black jeans, and dan promised himself he wont stare… as long as Phil is aware of it. “What’re my options?” He asked. 

“Oh, um, theres U2, The Doors, Talking Heads, Madness, a few video games soundtracks that PJ would be pissed if I touched without his permission-“ 

“Anything I'd know?” Dan tried again. 

“Panic at the disco?” Deadpanned Phil. 

“Rude.”

“Well, I’ve got Muse, but-“ said Phil, looking at all the records. 

“You’ve got muse?! And you made me hear Queen for half an hour?” Called dan jokingly from the bed.

“Queen is a great band,” corrected Phil as he pulled off a Muse album off the shelf and took the record from its cover.

“Queen is a 2 hits band,” shrugged dan, but dropped it, since Phil seemed to genuinely enjoy them, and he wasn't an opinion pusher.

“And my chemical romance is cheesy,” replied Phil in a teasing voice. 

Dan hadn't heard a song by my chemical romance for years now, but it was very hard for him not to say, “you take that back!” In an insulted voice. Phil chuckled. “Like you didn't hear them. Don't be a poser. You look like a cover boy to an emo magazine.” Added dan as Phil got back to the bed. 

“Is that an insult?” Asked Phil with a grin, his tongue peeking from between his lips. 

Dan definitely thought Phil was pretty enough to be on a cover. It was supposed to be an insult, though. 

“Shut up,” said dan, laying back again and staring at the ceiling. He could hear Phil chuckle.

They stayed in a comfortable little bubble for a while, saying random stuff like “but what if cheese didn't exist?” Or “whats you're favourite book?” Or “name the first three best movies that comes to mind” all while listening to muse, then oasis, then David bowie, when Phil’s phone started vibrating. 

“Oh no!” He calls, sitting up. Dan mimicked him, staring as Phil started texting furiously. “i’m such an idiot,” he murmured.

“What happened?” Asked dan as Phil got up and started walking around the room in such of his keys and jacket.

“I have a shift! I completely forgot I had one today.” Said Phil, walking to the record player and turning it off. 

Dan shifted his legs to the floor, but stayed on the bed, unsure what to say. “I didn't know the flower shop was open at this time?” He said. Phil stopped to look at him. 

“It isn't. I have a shift at the stupid cafe down two streets from here,” He said, sounding surprised dan didn't know. Dan stayed quiet for a long moment. Phil swayed awkwardly on his feet. “Ill walk you home?” He asked bashfully. 

Dan got up from the bed. “Ill walk you to work,” he declared instead. Phil thought for a moment, before shrugging and putting his jacket on.   
“Lets go, then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments! are! the reason i get up in the morning! also its my birthday yesterday so ummm im closer to dying now then ever


	5. of coffee shops, dreams and pianos

Phil’s work is- yet again- a small plant covered shop. Its very tiny and the lights are very dim and yellow, and theres soft music playing in the background.

Phil looks much less natural in here then in the flower shop, and on the way here he tells Dan the owners only hired him for night shifts because he’s intimidating enough to keep the peace around the place.

When they walk in the place is almost empty, except for a women sitting on an old couch and sketching in a notebook, and a collage student typing silently on his Mac between sips of coffee.  
Phil walks up to a waitress, which gives him a pleasant smile and tags her apron off. They chat for a while, and Phil gestures towards dan with his usual public-disinterested expression as he takes his jacket off.

The waitress immediately turns to look at dan eagerly, and he waves her awkwardly in return. She makes an excited motion toward Phil before patting him on the back and striding toward the exit.

Phil disappears into the back for a moment, and dan is left wondering whether this is his invitation to leave, but then Phil walks back out with a name tag stuck to his chest and a black apron he probably doesn't actually need around his waist and walks right back to dan with a smile.

“Its a school night,” says dan carefully. He tries saying, ‘why do you have a night shift on a School day’ and ‘I want to stay but I don't know if you want me to stick around' in one sentence, but from the way Phil’s smile dies down a bit, Dan figures Phil heard something like ‘i’m trying to let you off lightly’.

“Yeah,” replies Phil, rubbing the back of his neck, “well… i’ll see you In school, then,” he says. Dan stares at him for a second, wondering how could he explain Phil he doesn't want to leave without making it… weird, when the student with the Mac walks up to Phil and looks him up and down, something dan knows makes Phil uncomfortable, by the way his features Harden.

“Wheres the other waitress?” He asks in confusion. Phil gives him a bored look.

“Her shift is over. Can I help?” He says. 

The student takes a look at dan, before shrugging in an uncomfortable way and saying “more coffee would be great.”

Phil nods once, and walks behind the counter. The student recites his order as dan keeps staring longly at Phil.

“ill… go… now,” he says eventually, attracting Phil’s attention with a small goodbye wave. Phil shots him a tiny smile and nods.

“Dude,” says the student as Dan walks to the door, “are you queer?” The word stings Dan but he keeps walking.

“wouldn't you like to know.” Phil answers harshly, and then the door is closed behind him and dan cannot turn back.

~~~

Dan was... somewhere. It felt familiar, but everything around him was so dark, he couldn’t for the life of him recognize his surroundings.

A loud thumping noise came from outside, and dan recognized the song as one of muse’s more- uh, violent songs. It was more bass then anything, really. Heavy bass. It was drilling into dan’s skull, hammering at his brain. 

Am i... drunk? Dan thought, vaguely, as his back slammed into a wall he did not see, since his eyes were closed in a vain try to keep out the ever growing noise and since it was so. fucking. dark. 

“Dan?” And suddenly, everything stopped at once. The loud voice was gone, replaced by the voice of his savior. 

“Phil,” dan whines, sounding so terrifyingly relived as his body finally gave in and slid down the wall and into the floor. Phil stepped closer, his mare presence lighting the whole room; shading light on the shiny black floors and walls around. Outside, a new song by Radiohead started. It hummed softly through the walls as phil dropped to the floor in front of dan. 

Dan stares at phil. He is now shirtless, and looking dan up and down while biting his lip. Dan feels as is something is wrong, but cannot resist but to raise his hands up to touch Phil’s silk soft lips. Phil smirks and nails him down into the wall, pinning him with strong arms and firm lips. Dan can feel phil’s lip piercing biting into his own lips, and his knees feel weak. He wraps his arms around Phil’s shoulders and holds on as if Phil is air, and he is drowning.

“Phil,” he moans into the other’s lips, “i-“

Phil bites dan’s lower lip and dan grabs his silky black hair tightly. Phil’s hands wander down from his shoulders to his chest, to his stomach, to his-

It all feels so real. So close. And yet-

Dan wakes up to the sound of his alarm. It wasn’t his first wet dream, obviously, (well, by how far he got you can’t even categorize it as that, although dan is having quite a... problem that a cold shower could definitely fix) but, yeah, he knows the drill. It was, though, his first time dreaming about someone he was about to talk to in an hour from now. (Frustrating as it was, he was very glad this particular dream did not advance more then it did.)

~~~

Meeting Phil that morning was… different, somehow.

He was eyeing him desperately as he walked in, the image of Phil, shirtless, towering over him with a-

Phil sat down next to dan and dan’s head snapped away, focussing on- anything else, really.

“How was work?” Dan whisper-asked, looking straight at the teacher, careful not to make any eye contact.

“Alright,” replied Phil in a casual tone. “Did you get enough sleep last night?”

Oh did I- Thought dan sarcastically.

“I'm the one that’s supposed to ask that,” he said instead, “when is your shift even over?” He couldn’t help but sneak a look. Phil wasn't looking at him, but down at his notebook, where he was taking notes. Dan averted his eyes again quickly.

“Oh, you know…” Phil drifts off, trying to catch what the teacher is saying, “…late.”

Dan snorts, and out of the corner of his eye he can see Phil has a small, tired smile as well.

~~~

“Oh man, if you don't entertain me in the next-“ Phil looks at his left arm, even though he is not bearing a watch, “-10 seconds, I'm going to fall asleep,” He threatens.

Dan laughs. “Okay, okay-“ he looks around the room. Phil fakes a yawn and smirks at dan. 

“well…I actually know how to play" said dan, gesturing to the piano he was sitting next to. 

Phil looked stunned. "We've been in this room for months! Why didn’t you tell me before!?”

"Im not that good, nothing worth mentioning. It never came up." Shrugged dan. Damn his stupid need to impress Phil.

"Oh, dan, come on! you have to play me something now!" Said Phil, looking at dan with pleading eyes.

"Trust me, you don’t want to hear it," he said, but he can already feel himself giving in. 

"Anything? Please Daniel." Begs Phil, and dan can detect traces of Northern accent in the way he said his name.

Im a fucking goner, dan thinks as he sighs deeply, as if to make sure Phil is aware how he feels about doing this, and turns toward the piano. He weeps his hands once on his light blue jeans and places them on the piano. It was quiet for a moment, phil waiting paitently as dan tried scanning his mind for any songs he still remember. He tried an old classic song, one that his teacher insisted every pianist with respect should know, but halfway through he found that he could barely remember where should his hands go to next.

He stopped and peeped around at phil, whom was sitting on some table, and found him looking back at him with an admiring smile. Dan has never seen that expression directed toward him before. It made his heart a little bit jittery. 

He turned and faced the piano again, taking a deep breath. He put his hands back on the keys and started fambling over a few chords, unsure. Then, he took another breath, and started playing again. It was clearly a different song that dan didn’t know too well, messier, much less constracted, and it took Phil a few moments to understand what he was listening to.

When he did, though, he let out a surprised sound of recognition. 

"Oh!" He said, which made dan’s stomach turn for a split second, even though he knew Phil was not thinking about the same thing as he was. 

It was a Radiohead song- THE Radiohead song; the very same one that dream-dan and dream-phil kissed to last night.

 The melody dan was produsing was definitely wobbley, yet Phil hadn’t stoped him the whole way through. Dan tried to stop his mind to wandering back into the dream. He couldn’t remember anything about it... except how good it felt. Which is not something you think after dream-kissing your best friend. It just isn’t. Snap out of it Dan. 

“Ugh, fuck, i don’t know the rest,” said dan, frustrated. Phil, on the other hand, was smiling and clapping cheerfully, looking at dan with a look of such fundamental fondness dan felt like he had no choice but to send Phil a shy smile back. 

“Don’t be hard on yourself. It was better then i could ever,” encouraged Phil. Dan shook his head. A few petals fell off of his flower crown. It was the one Phil made him.

“Oh no,” said Phil, getting up from the table and closing the distance between him and dan. “You should have told me you need a new crown,” he says, reaching down to dan’s head and picking a flower petal stuck in his hair.

Dan looked down to Phil’s shoes. He did need a new one. For quite a while, in fact. Its very hard to return to fake flower crowns after trying the real thing. Well… that, and also… he found himself having a hard time getting rid of something hand made by Phil. Not that he planned on telling Phil about that.

“Uhhh,” said dan intelligently.

“I'll make you a new one,” declared Phil, tossing the Patel aside and picking another off of dan's shirt.

“You don't have to,” said dan, backing away from Phil with blush dusting his cheeks, trying to pretended like the gesture isn‘t incredibly touching to him.

“But I want to!” exclaimed Phil, sending dan on of his blinding smiles that make his stomach kind of flip.

“Okay,” answers dan weakly.

And then Phil walks back to the table and lays down, dropping an arm over his eyes and letting the other fall off the edge of the table, and murmurs, “I'm so bloody tired-“

And dan watches him silently, wondering if Phil is ever going to forgive him for getting the stupidest, most unneeded, extremely distracting crush dan apparently had on him.


End file.
